Steady Meanderings. : Reality check.......

I still remember the day when I was randomly watching TV during the holidays after my exam.I was so bored that I was watching the tamil serials with my grandmom!That was when I accidentally stumbled on this show on Star Vijay a tamil channel(good one), called as kadai alla nijam ( which means the truth, not a story).

There was this young man sitting with his mother and talking about his life.Me interested in knowing about other people's life innocently starts watching the show as my grandmother prepares herself for her afternoon siesta. He then starts talking about his love life.Like any other guy , he falls in love with a girl.Her name is mathura ( or is it zathura?) Her parents don't agree with this , things get ugly and goes to the police station.The girl and the boy are sure of their love for each other and the boy's mum is rationale but the girl's side are too primitive and start threatening her!

The boy turns hero asks the girls parents to mind their own business,brings her to his house,lives with her for 3 years happily.Then they get married and have a happy and blissful 6 months.Suddenly,the girl's parents have a change of heart and asks her to come home.The girl still trustful of her parents leaves home to see what the want to offer............the story is fine till now.

The boy who is in the office gets a call from his wife,her voice is crackling.She just tells him " They have cheated me.My life is in danger,please come and save me" between her tears.Our shocked boy starts rushing to the girl's home which is some village.He is bubbling with anxiety and tension when he gets a call from his office telling the girl died!!

Can you imagine that guy's situation? He still doesn't believe his beloved is dead and completes his journey to just receive that! After narrating all this he starts crying and I silently mourn for the girl's soul.Then his mom starts narrating what a wreck his had become after that.The continuous cryings and Sober suicides he tries to commit.Even I could feel the pain of that situation.

This was a true reality check for the blissful me and I started having nightmares about that story. I still can't control getting the atrocious amount of anger and hatred whenever I think about those relations of the girl.She was killed because she killed their honor! This is a crime which is not being watched properly by the legal system because it is 'culturally sensitive'. Hell! We have to stop thinking like that , it is a crime they are committing in the name of caste,religion etc etc.!

If you guys aren't bewildered by now take this! I recently read this book called 'daughters of shame' which triggered me to do this.The saddest part of the book was that it was 'non fiction'.It covers almost the stories of about 15 women and 2 men tortured by their own parents in the name of love and religion.

The book gets darker as we dig deeper as the victims are beaten up and imprisoned in their own houses once they start becoming teenagers, sedated , raped and eventually murdered if they don't follow the rulebook they are provided.The astonishing thing is some girls even after fleeing away from their households comeback as they can't stand the separation from their family and its negligence.These words came from a girl ,if I remember correctly was hit with a weapon which had nails on it,and which pierced her skin! (This was done by her mother ,because she supported her brother who was getting beaten up! )

The book horrified me with its reality. I feel rather guilty for the amount of freedom I am being provided with and how much we always tend to misuse it......

The author of this book, Jasvinder Sanghera needs special mention as she has not only written these books but has an organisation called 'karma nirvana' which provides help to all those women who are suffering from forced marriages and honor based crimes...

Unfortunately, Jas works only in London and the millions in India are still in the dark fighting and losing their own battles.This .is a serious problem to address with and I will be very happy if even 1 person became aware and conscious about this mass problem - specially with the no. of castes and sub castes in India!