Saturday, January 18, 2020

Bottle Tree



Alas! 
I am just a glass bottle hanging from a tree, 
oscillating in an orbit of pain
to the tune of my circumstances.
My emotions are somewhere sealed
inside that airtight bottle,
I think they are transparent
But ofcourse!
They are actually invisible to the onlooker.
And he asks,
What are you a glass bottle doing
clinging on to a bare tree?
I'm better off with my fellow bottle mates.
But once our paths collide,
Won't we just crash and break 
and let loose that noxious subtance 
which man calls love and
I call pain?

on
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27 comments:

  1. FireblossomJanuary 18, 2020 at 6:08 PM

    So sorry for your loss. May time make it easier for you. :-(

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  2. Carrie Van HornJanuary 19, 2020 at 1:03 AM

    Sometimes others do not see the grief we hold. This is lovely and holds so much sadness. Hoping for healing for your broken heart Samyuktha.

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  3. MaryJanuary 19, 2020 at 6:14 AM

    Sometimes love and pain are very much intertwined. May your good memories stay with you and the pain eventually subside a bit.

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  4. Sherry Blue SkyJanuary 19, 2020 at 8:14 AM

    Samyuktha, so pleased to find you at the Muse. I resonate with love equating with pain, and really felt your poem. It seems you have had a loss? I am so sorry to hear that. Take care.

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  5. MargaretJanuary 19, 2020 at 11:01 AM

    We try to contain our sorrow - and we do for a bit - but it must be released. So sorry, Hugs to you...

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  6. Rosemary Nissen-WadeJanuary 19, 2020 at 1:08 PM

    Oh, I feel the bitter anguish!

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  7. Sumana RoyJanuary 19, 2020 at 1:17 PM

    SO sorry for your loss. Love and pain so much intertwined here. A beautiful poem.

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  8. Kim M. RussellJanuary 19, 2020 at 2:10 PM

    Sending my heartfelt sympathy.
    Your extended metaphor illustrates pain so beautifully, especially the lines:
    ‘But once our paths collide,
    Won't we just crash and break
    and let loose that noxious substance
    which man calls love and
    I call pain?’

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  9. Jae RoseJanuary 19, 2020 at 4:08 PM

    Such a tender and poignant poem

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  10. R's RueJanuary 19, 2020 at 7:35 PM

    Wow.

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  11. Sanaa RizviJanuary 19, 2020 at 8:42 PM

    I am deeply sorry for your loss.

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  12. hedgewitchJanuary 19, 2020 at 9:40 PM

    This is very skillfully done. I too have lost someone in the last few months, and you have expressed here so well many of my own feelings--grief is impossible for me to understand some days, yet here you've put distinctly and plainly, especially in the discords,the difficulties of what seems transparent but is invisible. Your last lines are heartbreaking.

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  13. Magical Mystical TeacherJanuary 19, 2020 at 9:47 PM

    So often we try to cling to things that have slipped out of our grasp.

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  14. ZQJanuary 20, 2020 at 2:27 AM

    Well Written.

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  15. indybevJanuary 20, 2020 at 3:59 AM

    It is painful to watch the world go on as if it doesn't know your world has spun out of control. May you find the strength to endure and find the spark of light that is tomorrow.

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  16. Gillena CoxJanuary 20, 2020 at 4:06 AM

    Oh such a sad poem
    A blessed Sunday to you.

    Much❤love

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  17. Susie ClevengerJanuary 20, 2020 at 9:53 AM

    Oh, I we hide so much behind the glass we offer to the world. Grief can be fragile or fierce. So sorry for your loss.

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  18. Dr. Vandana SharmaJanuary 20, 2020 at 12:28 PM

    Pain and ,oive are interwined and what might be a beautifu lmemeory for one, might be a painful for other. Nice poem.

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  19. Old EggJanuary 20, 2020 at 4:10 PM

    Sadly mankind's greed discounts the need to maintain a healthy planet, so we must learn the hard way and slowly destroy the very things that keep us alive such as healthy rivers and seas, forests feeding us other creatures oxygen and sadly for us humanity dealing with our own kind all over the world that we choose to hate instead.

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  20. SusanJanuary 21, 2020 at 12:08 AM

    It is probably a wise choice for awhile, that bottled up feelings seek out trees rather than other bottles full--and even that they congregate in trees rather than in dangerous dumps! Such a sad and wise poem, acknowledging the relationship between love and pain. If you write from a recent loss, you give from a place of knowledge. Thank you.

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  21. JennaJanuary 22, 2020 at 12:07 AM

    I really like that metaphor and the imagery.

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  22. Susie ClevengerJanuary 22, 2020 at 2:43 AM

    So many times we hold our grief so close no one sees it or hears it. In that solitude we can wail or clinch our fists because we need to express the rawness we feel. Beautiful writing

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  23. purplepeninportland.comJanuary 23, 2020 at 6:47 AM

    I am sorry for your loss, and hope just the writing of this poem will help you. Beautiful poem, and ending.

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  24. HelenJanuary 24, 2020 at 11:29 PM

    Sending you love and healing energy.

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  25. Sherry Blue SkyFebruary 11, 2020 at 12:11 AM

    "Which man calls love and I call pain" - that really speaks to me. Lovely to read you, Samyuktha.

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  26. Rosemary Nissen-WadeFebruary 19, 2020 at 8:18 PM

    Hello. Just posting here for want of anywhere else, to say thank you for the good wishes re the art class. I do appreciate the wishes, and that you took the trouble.

    However that post was meant to go into my personal journal, which is set to private. Too late at night for me to be working, obviously, lol. So I have now removed it from my poetry blog.

    I don't mind that you saw it, and I'm glad you did comment, which alerted me to the fact it was in the wrong place. So if you should notice the post has now disappeared, that's why.

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Constructive criticism is the lifeblood of any work!

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